$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
