it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
