There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Are my feet made of real feet?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Randomize
