i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
