i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
