id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
