could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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