my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
