so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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