So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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