party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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