She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
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