I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
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Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
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I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
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