So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
