Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Randomize