I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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