I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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