just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
