Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Randomize
