Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
