dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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