No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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