Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize