I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
she peed on how many people?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
