He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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