Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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