i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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