Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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