Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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