You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
