It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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