Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
