You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
