dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
