Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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