It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize