Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
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