she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
