I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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