You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
