we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I had to cum in my sink.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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