It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
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I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
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It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
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