He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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