I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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