I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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