Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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