Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
You can't motorboat a personality
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
