Just mADE A PArabola og urine
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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