dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Randomize
