My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
