okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize