What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
