; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
she smelled like a LAN party
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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